У Гомера иссякли чернила,
Когда он сочинял про Ахилла.
И сказал он тогда,
Вовсе то не беда:
Ведь я слеп – ну зачем мне чернила!
А. Дубровский, 2011
Homer ran out of ink when he was writing about Achilles. But he said: "This is no trouble - as I'm a blind man anyway!"(makeshift translation of A. Dubrovski's poem).
For a story about a guy, 50-something, who sold his home in the village and left Russia for Bulgaria (The Moscow News newspaper).
There was a Young Lady of Clare,
Who was sadly pursued by a bear;
When she found she was tired,
She abruptly expired,
That unfortunate Lady of Clare.
E.Lear, 1846
There was an Old Man, on whose nose,
Most birds of the air could repose;
But they all flew away,
At the closing of day,
Which relieved that Old Man and his nose.
E.Lear, 1846
There was an Old Man of Aosta,
Who possessed a large Cow, but he lost her;
But they said, "Don't you see,
She has rushed up a tree?
You invidious Old Man of Aosta!"
E.Lear, 1846
There was an Old Person of Ewell,
Who chiefly subsisted on gruel;
But to make it more nice,
He inserted some mice,
Which refreshed that Old Person of Ewell.
E.Lear, 1846
There was an Old Person of Ems,
Who casually fell in the Thames;
And when he was found,
They said he was drowned,
That unlucky Old Person of Ems.
E.Lear, 1846
There was an old Person of Burton,
Whose answers were rather uncertain;
When they said, "How d'ye do?"
He replied, "Who are you?"
That distressing old person of Burton.
E.Lear, 1846
There was an Old Man at a casement,
Who held up his hands in amazement;
When they said, "Sir, you'll fall!"
He replied, "Not at all!"
That incipient Old Man at a casement.
E.Lear, 1846
There was an Old Person of Sparta,
Who had twenty-five sons and one daughter;
He fed them on snails,
And weighed them in scales,
That wonderful person of Sparta.
E.Lear, 1846
There was an Old Man of the Cape,
Who possessed a large Barbary Ape;
Till the Ape one dark night,
Set the house on a light,
Which burned that Old Man of the Cape.
E.Lear, 1846
There was an Old Person of Gretna,
Who rushed down the crater of Etna;
When they said, "Is it hot?"
He replied, "No, it's not!"
That mendacious Old Person of Gretna.
E.Lear, 1846
There was an Old Man with an owl,
Who continued to bother and howl;
He sate on a rail,
And imbibed bitter ale,
Which refreshed that Old Man and his owl.
E.Lear, 1846
There was an old Person of Chester,
Whom several small children did pester;
They threw some large stones,
Which broke most of his bones,
And displeased that old person of Chester.
E.Lear, 1846
There was an Old Person of Tartary,
Who divided his jugular artery;
But he screeched to his wife,
And she said, "Oh, my life!
Your death will be felt by all Tartary!"
E.Lear, 1846
There was a Young Lady of Welling,
Whose praise all the world was a-telling;
She played on the harp,
And caught several carp,
That accomplished Young Lady of Welling.
E.Lear, 1846
There was an Old Person of Cheadle,
Was put in the stocks by the beadle;
For stealing some pigs,
Some coats, and some wigs,
That horrible Person of Cheadle.
E.Lear, 1846
There was an Old Man, who said, "Well!
Will NOBODY answer this bell?
I have pulled day and night,
Till my hair has grown white,
But nobody answers this bell!"
E.Lear, 1846
There was an Old Person of Spain,
Who hated all trouble and pain;
So he sate on a chair,
With his feet in the air,
That umbrageous Old Person of Spain.
E.Lear, 1846
There was an Old Man of Berlin,
Whose form was uncommonly thin;
Till he once, by mistake,
Was mixed up in a cake,
So they baked that Old Man of Berlin.
E.Lear, 1846